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I'm Still Human

Many years ago, I was with my sister in law at a park. She was still in high school at the time and we ran across two of her musical heroes from a band she loved. They were playing with their families at the playset, swinging their small children.

I didn’t let her go bother them for an autograph. I told her we needed to be respectful of their personal time, that celebrities aren’t “on the clock” twenty-four-seven. She was a little resentful, especially when another fan appeared, but we didn’t bother them.

I think about that day a lot now.

A person who lives in the public’s eye myself now, I don’t have the luxury of going to the grocery store with no makeup, sunglasses, and a baseball cap thrown over my messy hair.

Everywhere I go, I will see someone I know.

I am constantly aware of my words, my actions, and whether I am dressed appropriately.

But I’m still human.

There are days I’m exhausted. Times when I want to cry because someone hurt my feelings. There are sick days and restless nights. Evenings that I just want to go home and curl up with a good book and a cup of tea, but instead I am stopped on my way out the door by an excited parent who wants to tell me about her child’s successes.

And I will stop. I will listen and smile, grateful to be a part of that family’s life. Grateful to share in their joy.

I’ll come to your child’s choir concert if you ask. Because it is important to you, and important to your daughter.

I will not complain. I chose this job, I chose to live my life in the spotlight, I fought to be on this road and will continue to fight to stay here.

Not everything I will do will be met with applause and joy. We all make decisions others will question.

But please remember, I am human. I am doing the best I can with what I have.

I read somewhere that there is always one more fact to the truth than I will know.

If you see me out and about, it’s okay to say hi. It’s okay to tell me you loved my book or that you appreciated something I did.

But if I look tired, or distracted, or if my smile isn’t what you expect – please remember, I’m human.

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